| 7 Ways to Read Body Language Posted: Noticing the signals that people send out with their body language is a very useful social skill. Some of us can read it naturally and some of us are notoriously oblivious. Fortunately, with a little extra attentiveness, you can learn to read body language, and with enough practice it'll become second nature. Steps - Gauge how close someone is to you. The closer they are, the warmer their opinions are of you. The farther away that someone is, the less they actually care. If you move slightly closer to them, do they move slightly further away? That means they don't want your interaction to be any more personal than it already is. If they don't move further away, then they are receptive. And if they respond by getting even closer to you, they probably really like you.
- It is worth noting that personal space is culturally fluid; keep in mind that what is considered close in one country is far away in another.
- Watch their head position.
- Overly tilted heads are either a potential sign of sympathy, or if a person smiles while tilting their head, they are being playful and maybe even flirting.
- Lowered heads indicate a reason to hide something. Take note if someone lowers their head. If it is when he is complimented, he may be shy, ashamed, timid, keeping distance from the other person, in disbelief, or thinking to himself. If it is after an explanation, then he may be unsure if what he said was correct.
- It should be noted that some cultures see this as a sign of respect.
- Cocked heads mean that they are confused or challenging you, depending on eye, eyebrow, and mouth gestures. Think of how a dog slightly cocks its head when you make a funny noise.
- Look into their eyes.
- People who look to the sides a lot are nervous, lying, or distracted. However, if a person looks away from the speaker, it very well could be a comfort display or indicate submissiveness. Looking askance generally means the person is distrustful or unconvinced.
- If someone looks down at the floor a lot, they are probably shy or timid.
- Some cultures believe that looking at someone in the eyes is a sign of disrespect, so this could explain why someone is avoiding eye contact with you.
- Dilated pupils mean that the person is interested. Keep in mind, however, that many drugs cause pupils to dilate, including alcohol, cocaine, amphetamines, MDMA, LSD and others. Don't mistake having a few drinks for attraction. Also, some people have permanently dilated pupils (a condition known as mydriasis).
- See if they're mirroring you. Mirroring is another common gesture. If someone mirrors, or mimics your appearance, this is a very genuine sign that they are interested in you and trying to establish rapport with you. Try changing your body position here and there. If you find that they change theirs similarly, they are mirroring.
- Check their arms.
- People with crossed arms are closing themselves to social influence. Though some people just cross their arms as a habit, it may indicate that the person is (slightly) reserved, uncomfortable with their weight (therefore trying to hide it), or just trying to hide something on their shirt. If their arms are crossed while their feet are shoulder width or wider apart, this is a position of toughness or authority.
- If someone rests their arms behind their neck or head, they are open to what is being discussed or just laid back in general.
- If their hands are on their hips, they might be waiting or impatient.
- Be aware of nervous gestures:
- If someone brushes their hair back with their fingers, this may be preening, a common gesture if the person likes you, or their thoughts about something conflict with yours. They might not voice this. If you see raised eyebrows during this time, you can be pretty sure that they disagree with you.
- If the person wears glasses, and is constantly pushing them up onto their nose again, with a slight frown, that may also indicate they disagree with what you are saying. Look to make sure they push up their glasses with an intent, not casually adjusting them. Look for pushing on the rim with two fingers, or an extra motion of wiggling the side of their glasses. The frown or raised eyebrows should tip you off.
- Lowered eyebrows and squinted eyes illustrate an attempt at understanding what is being said or going on. It's usually skeptical. This is presuming they are not trying to observe something that's far away.
- Watch their feet:
- A fast tapping, shifting of weight, laughing, or movement of the foot will most often mean that the person is impatient, excited, nervous, scared, or intimidated.
- Note though that some people with ADHD will constantly jiggle their legs. It doesn't mean anything, it's entirely subconscious and, while eccentric, it can't be stopped.
- If the person is sitting, feet crossed at the ankles means they're generally at ease.
- If while standing, a person seems to always keep their feet very close together, it probably means they are trying to be "proper" in some way.
- If they purposely touch their feet to yours, they are flirting!
Tips - It's easy to spot a confident person; they will make prolonged eye contact and have a strong posture. Long eye contact can also be found in lovers' eyes.
- Don't isolate yourself by constantly examining body language when interacting with people. Otherwise, there is no reason to gain a social upper hand anyway. This is paralysis by analysis.
- Watch the face, it will usually give off a quick involuntary and sometimes subconscious twitch when something happens that irritates, excites, or amuses them.
- Observing in context is key to understanding body language.
- Keep in mind that each person has their own unique body language called baseline behaviors.
- When observing others, be subtle about it.
- Pay special attention to CHANGES in body language rather than the body language itself.
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| wikiHow's 7 Step Program for Overcoming a Chocolate Addiction Posted: Seven days without chocolate makes one weak. ~ Anonymous Are you a chocoholic? Everyone likes a sweet treat once and a while. But if you can't get through the day without a chocolate fix, it's possible that you have a problem. This article will help you to identify if you have a chocolate addiction and help you to do something about it. Steps - Identify the symptoms. Not all researchers in the field of psychology perceive chocolate addiction as a "true addiction",[1] however, some researchers believe that the release of endorphins brought about by consuming chocolate creates a physical dependency to obtain that mood high again and again, thereby suggesting it is possible to be addicted to chocolate.[2] Whichever way you see it, cravings for chocolate are definitely real and very hard to resist if you have become habituated to consuming it. If you have uncontrollable cravings for chocolate, these may be some of the signs:
- You feel "conditioned" to need it at certain times of the day (the post-lunch afternoon dip being one good example).
- You salivate more in the presence of chocolate, or at the thought of it.
- You feel negative or anxious without it, and feel better for having it.[3]
- Identify why it is a problem in your life. If you think chocolate might be a problem, it is important to understand what challenges your chocolate addiction might be bringing into your life:
- It has become source of too many nutritionally-empty calories in your diet, adding to weight woes and reducing your nutritional intake (while chocolate has some benefits, the fat and sugar content do not).
- Neediness - you are not happy until you have consumed chocolate during the day. You will even go out of your way to purchase and stock up chocolate, feeling panic if you don't have it in a "stash".
- You're getting headaches, even severe ones, after consuming chocolate but you still eat it anyway.[4]
- Feeling under par, lacking in energy half an hour or so after eating chocolate (the sugar crash). To counteract this, you're eating even more chocolate.
- Binge-eating, defensiveness or lying about eating chocolate if other people near to you disapprove, or if you're trying to cover it up out of shame.
- Sub-optimal skin or complexion (likely in combination with a generally unhealthy diet, and chocolate's sugar and fat content is adding more nutritional strain).
- Financial - if you've suddenly developed a penchant for imported European chocolate, or you're stocking up on lots of chocolate regularly, it can hit the wallet!
- Identify the cause. There are a number of possibilities that might be fueling your chocolate addiction or cravings. Consider whether any of the following apply to you:
- Emotional problems: You are feeling down, anxious, depressed, disappointed, angry about unresolved issues, etc., and chocolate has become a major source of lifting your mood.
- Staving off hunger: You are hungry and chocolate is handy, readily available, and cheap. This can be especially tempting if there is chocolate readily available in your workplace or college. Or, perhaps you are on a diet and you feel deprived of pleasurable foods that you'd normally enjoy, so you're sneaking it without counting its calorie burden on your diet.
- Sense memory: Perhaps the simple memory of the taste of chocolate is enough to trigger your desire for it, or seeing a photo of chocolate online, in a painting, or in a book sets you off.
- Boredom: Chocolate fills in time and provides a pleasurable distraction while you're waiting, or while you're procrastinating over a report or essay that you aren't enjoying but have to finish.
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Add a little more broccoli to your day - Make a decision to stop craving chocolate or using it as a crutch. It's important to want to make a change for the better, otherwise, you won't.[5]
- Find alternative energy boosts. Eat more protein and grains for lunch to give you afternoon energy. Eat fruit and veggies for snacks, have a few nuts and seeds, try fat-free crackers, and drink more water. Eat chocolate only as an occasional treat rather than as a snack.
- Lessen the amount of chocolate consumed every week. Get more from your food experience by treating yourself to smaller portions of better quality chocolate. Concentrate on enjoying and prolonging the experience. Try a bar of 80 percent cocoa chocolate (this will contain a lot less sugar) from a health food store, and make it last a week.
- Stop going down the confectionery aisles in the supermarket. Usually there is nothing nutritionally healthy in this aisle anyway!
- Use aromatherapy to give your senses a boost. Choose favorite scents, but preferably not chocolate!
- Find something else to do. When boredom, procrastination, and frustration set in, feed your need for energy release rather than your emotions. Go for a power walk, do some stretches, wash the dishes, feed the cats, take some time away from anywhere that has chocolate.
- Keep your chocolate supply low or non-existent. That means replacing home and work chocolate stashes with other snacks (healthy ones, like fruits, are better!). If you are not able to resist eating chocolate when it is in the house, stop buying it for stocking up. Tell friends not to give you chocolate, and ask family members to hide their stashes somewhere else!
- Try new foods with plenty of flavors. Cook up some Thai food, or try African cuisine. Hopefully you'll find some new favorite foods from this.
- See your dentist. Ask for a check-up and perhaps a whitening treatment or a polish. The check-up might reveal that chocolate hasn't been kind to your teeth, and the whitening treatment or polish might inspire you to not spoil your teeth with more sweets.[6]
- Know what to expect as you minimize your chocolate intake. You might experience withdrawal symptoms and you might be tempted to replace chocolate with other sweet treats such as cookies and cake. Some things that might accompany minimizing your chocolate intake include:
- Expect the possibility of some caffeine withdrawal symptoms. This will be even more marked if you have been eating coffee chocolate products, such as chocolate coated coffee beans.
- Expect the possibility of some sugar withdrawal symptoms. If you do experience this, it might manifest itself in lower energy levels (initially but these will bounce back), irritability, depression, mood swings and even flu-like symptoms.[7] See How to Stop Sweet Cravings for more advice.
- Expect the possibility of feeling irritable, out of sorts, and reaching for the chocolate stash as a matter of habit.
A little bit of dark chocolate is better than sweet substitutes - Be ready for chocolate cravings by having healthy standbys readily available at all times (fruit, nuts, vegetables, dip, etc.).
A cup of quality cocoa might be a better choice for your health - Catechins: Cocoa beans contain catechins, an antioxidant that can help guard against cancer and heart disease. While dark chocolate is a good source of these catechins, only eat in moderation and only quality dark chocolate. Another method for getting the catechins without the fat and high calorie intake is to drink cocoa.[8]
- Cocoa butter: While pure cocoa might be a beneficial food in small amounts, most processed chocolate contains an array of ingredients including sugar, corn syrup, milk fats / dairy cream, hydrogenated oils, etc., detracting on the whole from its nutritional benefits. If you continue to consume chocolate, stick with dark chocolate only, and check that it has not been adulterated with dairy, sugar, or other products. Cocoa butter of itself (rather than added fat) is considered to have no effect on cholesterol levels, so look for chocolate with only cocoa butter (not vegetable fat/oils/butter fat).[9] Remember though, that all chocolate has the potential to be fattening.
Video Tips - Tell your friends that you're trying to change your eating habits, so they can support you.
- The main fat in chocolate is stearic acid. It is not considered to increase cholesterol levels.[10]
- Eat everything in moderation. Even chocolate.
Warnings - If you're eating for emotional reasons, seek professional advice.
- Too much of any manufactured sweet food is unhealthy and increases your risk of dental cavities, diabetes, heart disease, etc. Ask for your doctor's advice if you don't know how to reduce your chocolate habit on your own.
- Be aware that a lot of the studies proving how good chocolate is for you are industry-funded. Think critically when reading such justifications and don't fall for making these your justifications too.
Things You'll Need - Distractions
- Healthy food choices, healthy snacks
- Quality, dark chocolate in moderation
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